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Wednesday, July 21, 2010

Its been a few days since everything started... ...

It seem like i have eaten the wrong pill. Called the emo pill.

Cried alone and Tears went dry... ... But thing doesnt went well at all...

Who can i cry to? Friends have their own life too. They have no much time to hear me cry and nag.

I thought i could stop crying, but no, i just realise whenever someone or something about him have mention or come across my mind. Tears start pouring...

People close to me will scold me and ask me to move on and STOP CRYING.
People not sure about us will say its a waste as its a 2 year plus relationship. What a Waste?

Myself? Both. Convencing myself that i should move on and lead a better life without him, other side thinking about this wasted 2 year plus relationship.

To be strong, i will tell myself how bad he have done this to me. How heartless and curel he left me alone here. And how much miserable he have cause to me and yet he can live happily and crazy fun out there now.

Iszzit a wrong from the start for both of us, like what my close friends K & MY say from the start...?

Alot of things stay unsolve. I never know how he felt till now why can he leave this relationship and left me unknowingly. Take everything away from me and Left nothing!! Like what he mention in his fb. His life is his playfulness and have fun.

Been keeping myself busy. Madly busy to not think of anything as much as possible. But guess how scary and deep he have left the scare in my heart. Even the only free time i have in toilet and taking a train, things just pop out of my mine. My laughter is so bitter and my smile is so solid that i can no longer smile relaxing from ear to ear.

Time is everything that solve the thing. Thats what all say and i know. This is period to go over. But something seem to pull me back. Hoping for a U-turn or a reverse of something.

I dont know how long more i can stay on. The one everybody is seeing now is someone who is holding herself up with a stick. And the stick may break anytime. If you think everything is fine, then i am lying.

-Rain never stop... just like the weather in Singapore now..
-No sign of the sun... No hope
-Thus the Rainbow shall stay hidden or disappear forever...

J.y

~ { 11:26:00 AM }
aiming for the sky above;